Do you ever feel like your brain is full of bit-part actors?
My mind just needs a few seconds of visuals to kickstart streaming feed, like an organic version of the Internet Movie Data Base. For some unknown reason, the cells upstairs are programmed to instantly recall an actor's entire television history in the blink of an eye.
I'm a walking information booth that charges a handful of popcorn, and maybe some icecream. All a friend has to whisper is, "Why does the main character's younger brother look vaguely familiar? What's he from?" and I'll come back with, "He was a dead man haunting his brother in a third season of Ghost Whisperer, a recently returned Vietnam Vet in a flashback scene from Cold Case and, I'm pretty sure, a recurring character in a teen show on the Disney channel in the late eighties."
Unless Hollywood decides to summer in Perth rather than the Hamptons, this isn't a marketable skill. Sure, it impresses film and television fans, but in general, as my family constantly tell me when I try to point out that the actress on screen played a classmate of Sabrina the Teenage Witch eight years ago, "Shut up already. Noone CARES."
Let's make this clear. I'm not talking one or two roles here. My mind recalls actors from their first big break. Yes, that walk-on non-speaking part in an indie film seventeen years prior, followed by the rest of their screen time up to the present day. The kind of visual recognition that would take up a wall of hard drives. Whole lotta RAM.
To my brain, film and television is one long complex puzzle, somewhere between a crossword and Soduku. The name of the game would be something like Place-A-Face... with the occasional information overload.
Take the actor who plays Detective Ryan in Castle. He's a Small Screen Regular, aka a facial recognition imprint that can send my mind into overdrive. "Mechanic-in-one-episode-of-Charmed" jumps out first, but numerous one episode appearances flood through after that. He did single eps of Crossing Jordan and Jag way back in the day, Ghost Whisperer and NCIS: Miami more recently.
Basically, the sight of his face short-circuits the tv memory portion of my brain. TMI.
The big question is, how much thinking room is all this actor recognition taking up? I mean, could I have picked up another language, or a second degree, with the brain space that's been allocated to recording the faces of bit part actors in every television scene I've ever watched?
Looking on the bright side (I always like the bright side), it makes the television industry as a whole seem more intertwined, and kind of familial. For example, I like noting how often actors swing guest roles for follow thespians they've worked with in the past. It adds a homey touch to the viewing experience.
One program that consistently strives to cast quality talent is Smallville, aka The Adventures of Young Superman. Because of its comic book origins, Smallville's scripting style has often allowed actors to really run the gamut of emotions.
Smallville alumni you might recognise? Laura Vandervoort (Lisa in the new V), Sam Witwer (Being Human US version), Jesse Metcalfe (Desperate Housewives), Kristin Kreuk (Chuck), Jensen Ackles (Supernatural), Ian Somerhalder (The Vampire Diaries); just the tip of the iceberg.
And let's not forget, Smallville always welcomed the beloved like James Marsters from Buffy and Michael Shanks from Stargate. They even collected classic faves with open arms (here's lookin' at you, Jane Seymour and Terence Stamp!).
In case you're wondering, Smallville rated a wind-up mention in this blog because the cult show is closing up shop. Having logged up an epic decade on the small screen, its departure marks the end of a (viewing) era for fans. Although never an avid watcher, I will definitely miss the show's heroic presence (get it?). It's been a long run for Clark Kent... Bon voyage Superman x
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